My slice of Heaven

Friday, April 27, 2012

I'm going to jump way out of my comfort zone today, but I really want to remember all of these times...

I have never felt comfortable talking about marriage. Ever. But, I did know that when I was comfortable with it, then I would know for sure that it was time for me to take that step.

Dustin proposed to me on Valentines Day of 2011 and a Red Barn Steak House which was super romantic. It sounds super country, I know, but everyone eats in their own area, and nobody really bothers you. If you want service, you simply flip your light on and they come to the half wood/half screen door. After he proposed, I was very exstatic. I love Dustin, and I really love that he didn't propose to me right after we found out we were having Mackenzie. To each their own, I was just happy with knowing that when Dustin propsed, it would be because he was ready and wanted to.. Not because he was pressured to.

So, in all honesty, as excited I was to be engaged to Dustin, there was a huge part of me that simply just wasn't ready. It wasn't Dustin. It was all me. At first, I felt super guilty about it. I just asked myself all the time what was wrong with me? I mean I love this guy and he is dying to marry me, and I'm not even comfotable saying the "Marriage" word? And since Dustin holds me accountable for every.single.move I make, we sat down one night and I'm sure we talked all night long.

I was so scared that he was going to blame himself, which at first he did, but after lots, and I mean lots of talking, he did realize that it was all me. I wasn't in the wrong, I just needed more time. He was also glad that I was very honest, and didn't just go through the motions of having a wedidng when I mentally was not there.

When Dustin decided to take his new job at the end of last year, we were both at breaking points. We both had jobs we absolutely hated, and I wouldn't even say we lived paycheck to paycheck. We barely got by. The stress on him was unbelievable because he felt like he wasn't providing for his family. We both took new jobs within a week of each other, and made a complete turn around. As bad as I hated for Dustin to take a job that entailed deployement, it was so good to see that smile back on his face.

After Dustin left for his very first deployement, I had a lot of time to myself. The same thought kept coming into my mind over and over.... If Dustin and I were to die tomorrow, would we get to live together in heaven? Would we see each other every day? Would I even see him at all?

I started talking Dustin's ear off via Skype on when we were going to get married, because I was ready to do this, oh lets say... Yesterday!

We started the planning ever since...

Big or Small Wedding?      Small
Hometown or Destination Wedding?      Destination
Lots of friends invited or family only?      Family only
Beach close to where we live or far away?      Far away

All smiles while dad was home on leave!

When we started talking weddings, Dustin started talking to a buddy while he was overseas... His buddy gave him the name of a lady he used when he bought his wifes wedding rings. Dustin picked this beauty out by himself (along with the wedding band, because he is on top of things!) and he had it shipped from Lake Tahoe to Florida where we were vacationing. He gave it to me on Sanibel Island one of our last days on vacation. I still sit and stare at this thing! He did so good!

And just a reminder of why I love him so much.

I had sent an iMessage to Dustin about how thankful I am that he listens to my every word, and doesn't try to "fix" the problem. He just listens. And told him the story about needing to live with him in heaven. This was some of his response.

I can't wait to marry this man! We are both so excited!

St. Thomas, Virgin Islands

Thursday, April 26, 2012

My blog is going to be hijacked with all sorts of wedding stuff for the next two months.This June, I get to go with Dustin, Mackenzie and my family to St. Thomas to marry Dustin! We cannot wait to go, and I want to keep up with all the small details that we have to pick. It will be fun to look back on... So here are some pictures I have been drooling over...




Just for my memory... Dustin and I decided a long time ago we wanted to have a very small wedding. We want this day to be all about us, and after being in my friend Andies' beach wedding last year, we knew this would be so much fun... And since we did things backwards (baby first), this works out perfect to have my family there with us to help with Mackenzie.

Let the madness begin.....    

Kali's 30th Birthday

Monday, April 16, 2012

This weekend we went to Oklahoma City for my cousins 30th Birthday Party.

Mackenzie and her cousin Landen are 18 months a part and they had a lot of fun playing this weekend.

And Mackenzie played with Landens puppy, Angus, all day long

Ahh... Life is tough with you are 2!

Mackenzie pushing Landen in his swing.. Look at his sweet face!

My big girl in Landens ride

She wanted to help Landen with everything since she is such a big girl! Notice the death grip on his sippy cup...

Even though it was Kali's 30th Birthday, she made these Elmo cupcakes for M. Aren't they precious?

And here are just a few pictures from our photo shoot! 

Thankfully we weren't near any tornados this weekend!

Easter Sunday

Friday, April 13, 2012

Kaci and Erik stayed with me on Saturday night, because Kaci came to church with me on Sunday. We had our services at the PAC at the High School, and I am so glad Kaci went with me.. I don't mind going by myself to our regular service, but since we were out of the norm, I am glad I had some company.

We made Erik do a photoshoot for us :)

 Thanks to our obsession with local boutiques, both of our dresses came from Riffraff
And my mom found Mackenzie's dress off of Zulily
I have ordered so many clothes for Mackenzie on that website! Can't beat the cheap prices!

Kaci and Erik

 I love this sweet girl!

Mackenzie has a boyfriend in the Nursery at Church. It's so sweet. When we leave she only tells Robby bye, and when we had a Easter Egg hunt a couple of weeks ago, M found Robby and gave him of her eggs... This girl doesn't share with anyone, so I was shocked!

Hope everyone had a great Easter!
(Even though its 5 days late!)

Mommy, Call My Kaci?

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Mackenzie LOOVVEESS her Aunts!!

We saw Hannah and Kaci quite a bit this weekend for Easter, and M has been begging for them ever since... Erik played with Mackenzie quite a bit on Friday night, and he watched her while we had a girls day on Saturday... to say she is in love with him would be an understatement....

Hannah and Kaci and Erik went back home on Sunday, and Mackenzie has asked to talk to them at least a thousand times... I won't even go into the temper tantrums thrown when I wouldn't call them.

Here are some pictures from Mackenzie talking on the phone with "My Kaci" last night at dinner... 

Rotten Much?

We got to talk to Hannah last night too, but I didn't get any pictures.. It was close to M's bedtime and she was over the phone by then...

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